256Pi's The Rosen Family Chronicles Wiki
Older Rosen
Biographical information
Occupation None
Related to Richard Rosen (brother), Michael & Brian Rosen (cousins)
Age Unknown, at least 75
First Appears In What's This Ear?

Older Rosen is Michael Rosen's cousin and one of the main characters in The Rosen Family Chronicles. He is considered to be the most comical one in the group, goofing around a lot and saying various catchphrases. However, he is not the weirdest character in the Rosen Family Chronicles (astonishing, right?).

Early Life[]

Older Rosen was born in London. It is thought that when he was a baby a nurse accidentally fed him chocolate milk instead of formula milk. As a result he became obsessed with anything chocolate throughout his life, most notably chocolate cake, and goes as far as trying to steal it. His brother Richard was born several years later without this treatment and he turned out to act like a relatively normal person.

Older Rosen never attended university. For some reason or another.

Recent Life[]

Older Rosen lives in Hackney, in the same apartment complex as his cousins Michael and Brian, however his apartment contains little to no lights (due to his lack of employment). He sometimes hides a piece of chocolate cake behind the sofa in a room there.

He has the convenient advantage of being able to teleport (not cs188 style with big blue beams appearing), randomly disappearing and instantly appearing elsewhere by cupping his hand and clicking his tongue, followed by a Yoda noise. Usually, instead of walking, he only appears a few feet in front of his earlier position, saying "Chocolate" every time he moves.

He is obviously still obsessed with chocolate cake, however he also likes chocolate bagels. He keeps a pack of chocolate bagels behind the television in the Don't Be Cheeky studio, although usually he just flicks them around. He also occasionally decides that a little bit of gooseberry jam would improve the situation (even though all he does is tend to throw it at things like a train window or something).

He has particularly strong arms, and can launch anyone around him a considerable distance with one punch. (Some call his punch the "one fingered death punch".) As a result he almost never loses fights. He has beaten the likes of The Presents Inspector, The Pocketfoogle (twice), Doctor Jump, and The Potatofoogle (who really couldn't fight back, let's be honest). Only once has he come out on the bottom, against Lollipop Lady, who had the unfair advantage of her exploding lollipops, which she used several times to launch him into oblivion, although he was able to score a direct hit on her.

His phone, the Rosen-O-Phone, is a blue block on a curly wire which comes from the ceiling whenever he gets a call. His ringtone is "Happy Up Here" by Röyksopp.

He has also twice caused a train to fly into the air, the second time claiming that "No one would know anything about it..."